فصل 29

29

Repurposed

Rowan felt the world spin. He could breathe out, but couldn’t breathe in, as if Scythe Rand’s knee was on his chest again—as if the room were floating in space, and he longed for the ecstasy of unconsciousness, because that was a better alternative than what he now faced.

“Yes, I can see how the voice would have confused you,” Goddard said, still sounding like Tyger. “It couldn’t be helped.” “How . . . how . . . ,” was all Rowan could get out. While Rand’s survival had been a shock, at least it made sense—but Rowan had decapitated Goddard! He had seen the man’s headless body burn!

But now Rowan looked to Rand, who stood there in obedience to her mentor, and Rowan knew. Oh, God, he knew.

“You managed to decapitate me right at the jawline,” Goddard said, “above the larynx. Thus my old vocal chords are gone forever. But these will do.” And what made it even worse was that Goddard wasn’t wearing a scythe’s robe; he was wearing Tyger’s clothes, all the way down to his shoes. It was intentional, Rowan realized—so there would be no doubt in Rowan’s mind what had been done. Rowan turned away.

“No, you must look,” Goddard said. “I insist.” The guard went behind Rowan, grabbed his head, and forced him to face the man in the wheelchair.

“How could you do this?” Rowan hissed.

“Me? Heavens no!” he told Rowan. “It was all Ayn’s idea. I couldn’t do much of anything. She had the presence of mind to rescue the critical part of me from the burning cloister. I am told that I was senseless for nearly a year—blissfully on ice. Believe me, if this had been my doing, it would have been different. It would be your body to which my head would now be attached.” Rowan could not hide his anguish. His tears flowed with fury and unimaginable sorrow.  They could have chosen anyone for this, but they hadn’t. They chose Tyger. For the sole reason that he was Rowan’s friend.

“You sick bastards!”

“Sick?” said Goddard. “I wasn’t the one who beheaded his mentor scythe and turned against his comrades. What you did—and what you’ve been doing during my nitrogen slumber—is unforgivable by scythe law! Ayn and I, on the other hand, have broken no laws. Your friend Tyger was gleaned, and then his body was repurposed. Simple as that. It may be unorthodox, but under the circumstances, it is entirely understandable. What you see before you is nothing more and nothing less than the consequence of your own actions.” Rowan watched Tyger’s chest rise and fall with Goddard’s breathing. His hands rested limply on the arms of the wheelchair. It seemed a chore for him to move them.

“This sort of procedure is, of course, much more delicate than simple speedhealing,” Goddard said. “It will take a few more days until I have full control of your friend’s body.” Then he struggled to raise his hand, regarding it as he flexed his fingers into a fist.

“Look at that progress! I look forward to the day that I can take you on in Bokator. I understand you’ve already been helping to train me.” Training. It all made a twisted sort of sense now. The sparring, the attention to Tyger’s physique. Even the massages—like Kobe beef being prepared for slaughter. But there was one question left. Something Rowan did not want to ask, but he felt he owed it to Tyger.

“What did you do to—” Rowan couldn’t even bring himself to say the word “—to the rest of him?” Rand shrugged, as if it were nothing. “You said it yourself, Tyger wasn’t much in the brains department. Everything above the neck was expendable.” “Where is he?”

Rand didn’t answer the question, so Goddard did.

“Thrown out with the rest of the garbage,” he said, with a dismissive wave of  Tyger’s hand.

Rowan lunged forward, forgetting his bonds—but his fury did little more than rock the chair. If he could ever get free from this chair, he would kill them. Not just glean them, but kill them. Rip them limb from limb with such blatant bias and malice aforethought it would incinerate the second commandment!

And this was what Goddard wanted. He wanted Rowan to be consumed by murderous rage, yet be powerless to use it. Impotent to avenge his friend’s terrible fate.

Goddard soaked up Rowan’s misery as if nourished by it.

“Would you have given yourself to save him?” Goddard asked.

“Yes!” Rowan screamed. “Yes, I would have! Why didn’t you take me?”

“Hmm,” said Goddard, as if it were merely a minor revelation. “In that case, I’m glad for the choice Ayn made. Because after what you did to me, you must be made to suffer, Rowan. I am the aggrieved party here, so it is my wishes that must be honored—and it is my wish that you live in abject misery. It’s fitting that this began in fire, because you, Rowan, now suffer the fate of the mythical Prometheus—the bringer of fire. Not all that different from Lucifer—the ‘bearer of light’ from whom you took your scythe name. Prometheus was chained to the face of a mountain for his indiscretion, doomed to have his liver devoured by eagles until the end of time.” Then he rolled closer, and whispered, “I am your eagle, Rowan.  And I will feed on your misery day after day for eternity. Or until your suffering bores me.” Goddard held his gaze for a moment more, then had the guard roll him out.

Over the past two years, Rowan had been physically beaten, psychologically flayed, and emotionally battered. But he had survived it. What hadn’t killed him had made him stronger—more resolved to do what was necessary to fix what was broken. But now it was he who was broken. And there weren’t enough nanites in the world to repair the damage.

When he looked up, he saw that Scythe Rand was still there. She made no move to cut his bonds. He didn’t expect her to. How could the eagle devour his insides if he were cut free? Well, the joke was on them. He didn’t have anything left inside to devour. And if he did, it was pure poison.

“Get out,” he told Rand.

But she didn’t go. She just stood there in her bright green robe—a color that Rowan had come to despise.

“He didn’t go out with the garbage,” Scythe Rand said. “I took care of it myself, then spread his ashes in a field of wild bluebonnets. Just saying.” Then she left, leaving Rowan to find what solace he could from the lesser of two horrors.