فصل چهارم

chapter-4

In Kansas City, Missouri, the game-making Krinkle brothers were facing a crisis.

Their newest game was a bomb. Children hated it. Parents hated it. Sales were plummeting.

In damage-control mode, the Krinkle brothers quickly convened a focus group to find out why the new product launch had been such a failure.

The two brothers, Frederick and David, who were both well over sixty, sat in a viewing room behind a one-way mirror. Both wore suits, ties, and crisp white shirts. Both fiddled with their golden “K” cuff links.

The “respondents”—children ages ten through fifteen—and a research moderator were on the other side of the glass, seated around a long conference table.

“So are you guys ready to help us make a good game even better?” asked the chipper moderator.

The children shrugged.

“I guess,” said one, whose name tag labeled him as Jack. “I mean, you guys are paying us and all.” “Good attitude!” said the moderator. “Okay, you’ve all had a chance to play with Whoop Dee Doodle Thirteen. Reactions? Thoughts?” The children shrugged again.

“It’s sort of boring?” said a girl named Lilly.

The other kids started nodding. “ ’Boring’ is a good word for it,” said one.

“Stupid,” said a boy.

“And sad,” said a girl. “It’s just sad.”

“It’s the exact same game as Whoop Dee Doodle Twelve,” added Jack. “And Whoop Dee Doodle Eleven.” In the viewing room, David Krinkle’s left eye started twitching.

“That’s not true,” he muttered. “We put a smiley face on the whoopee cushion!” “Ungrateful brats,” mumbled Frederick, who was always a little grumpier than David.

The object of all the Krinkle brothers’ Whoop Dee Doodle games was to get your teammates to guess a phrase or famous saying by using only pictures, no words. If the time in the sandglass ran out before your team guessed correctly, you had to sit on a whoopee cushion.

Whoop Dee Doodle 13 was the thirteenth edition of the game. A bright yellow starburst on the box top said it was “All New and All Fun!” The company’s lawyers assured the Krinkles they could legally make that claim because the clue cards and phrases were new. So was the sandglass. It used to be pink. Now it was purple.

But customers weren’t buying the claim or the game.

And it was the only new product the Krinkle brothers had in the pipeline for the coming holiday season—just six months away.

“My grandmother made me play Whoop Dee Doodle Thirteen when I was home sick from school last month,” said Lilly. “It was about as much fun as the stale saltines and flat ginger ale she gave me.” “Okay, okay,” said the moderator. “I’m hearing you. Let me topline these notions.” He turned his back to the kids and started filling a whiteboard with words like “boring,” “stupid,” “sad,” and “stomach flu.” While the moderator wasn’t paying attention, Jack showed Lilly his smartphone.

“Have you played Mr. Lemoncello’s Oh, Gee, Emoji! yet?” he whispered to her.

“No.”

“Okay, let’s put the phone away, Jack,” said the moderator.

Jack didn’t listen. “Guess the book or movie.” He showed everybody the emoji clue.

Lilly studied the phone.

The other boys and girls leaned across the table to peer at Jack’s phone and try to solve the puzzle first.

“Got it!” said Lilly. “It’s The Wizard of Oz!” “Is that game fun?” asked a boy.

“Fun?” said Jack, happily imitating the tagline on every Lemoncello TV commercial. “Hello? It’s a Lemoncello!” “Enough,” fumed Frederick behind the one-way mirror. “Turn them off! I hate those stupid commercials!” David flicked the intercom switch so they wouldn’t have to listen to the little monsters in the other room.

“Thirteen was bad luck,” said David, his eye spasming. “That’s all.” “Bad luck? It could ruin us!” Frederick was seething.

“We just need a new idea,” said David. “A new game. Something spectacular. A home run!” “We also need a way to stop Luigi Lemoncello once and for all,” said Frederick, working his hands together. “That ludicrous lunatic has been a boil on our backsides long enough.” David smirked. “The answer is simple.”

“Oh, really? And how do you propose we create a new smash hit while simultaneously crushing Mr. Lemoncello’s Imagination Factory?” “Easy. We just need to increase our research and re-positioning efforts.” Frederick actually smiled. “Hmm. Too bad Benjamin Bean is no longer in our employ. He was one of the best researchers we ever hired.” “Don’t worry,” said David. “Our new recruit is already on the job.” “Is he up to the task?”

“Oh, yes. In fact, she will start this weekend!”