فصل 17

Chapter 17

I SAT AT THE BASE of the tree, legs folded up to my chest, waiting. Mom always said that was what we were supposed to do when we were lost. It gave me time to think about what had happened.

How was it possible that rebels had gotten into the palace two days in a row? Two days in a row! Had things gotten so much worse on the outside since the Selection had begun? Based on what I’d seen back in Carolina and had experienced at the palace, this was unprecedented.

My legs had a bunch of scratches on them, and now that I wasn’t hiding, I could finally feel the sting. There was also a small bruise halfway up my thigh that I wasn’t sure how I’d acquired. I was thirsty; and as I settled down, I felt worn-out from the emotional, mental, and physical strain of the day. I let my head rest against the tree, closing my eyes. I didn’t intend to fall asleep. But I did.

Sometime later, I heard the distinct sound of footsteps. My eyes flashed open, and the forest was darker than I remembered. How long had I been asleep?

My first instinct was to climb back up the tree, and I ran around to the other side, stepping on the torn remnants of the rebel girl’s bag. But then I heard people calling my name.

“Lady America!” someone said. “Where are you?” “Lady America?” another voice called. Then, after a while, in a loud voice, a command came. “Be sure to look everywhere. If they’ve killed her, they might have hung her or tried to bury her. Pay attention.” “Yes, sir,” men chorused back.

I peeked around the tree, focusing on the sound. I squinted, trying to make out the figures moving through the shadows, unsure they could really be here to save me. But one guard, his slight limp not slowing him at all, made me finally sure that I was safe.

A small patch of fading sunlight fell across Aspen’s face, and I ran. “I’m here!” I yelled. “I’m over here!” I ran straight into Aspen’s arms, for once not caring about who saw. “Thank goodness,” he breathed into my hair. Then, turning toward the other figures, “I’ve got her! She’s alive!” Aspen bent down and picked me up, cradling me. “I was terrified we were going to find your body somewhere. Are you hurt?” “My legs a little.”

A second later, several guards were surrounding us, congratulating Aspen on a job well done.

“Lady America,” the one in charge said, “are you injured at all?” I shook my head. “Just some scratches on my legs.” “Did they try to hurt you?”

“No. They never caught up to me.”

He looked a bit shocked. “None of the other girls could have outrun them, I don’t think.” I smiled, finally at ease. “None of the other girls is a Five.” Several of the guards chuckled, Aspen included.

“Good point. Let’s get you back.” He went in front of us and called out to the other guards, “Be on the lookout. They could still be lingering in the area.” As we moved, Aspen talked to me quietly. “I know you’re fast and smart, but I was terrified.” “I lied to the officer,” I whispered.

“What do you mean?”

“They did catch up with me, eventually.”

Aspen looked at me in horror.

“They didn’t do anything, but this one girl saw me. She curtsied and ran off.” “Curtsied?”

“I was surprised, too. She didn’t look angry or threatening at all. In fact, she just looked like a normal girl.” I thought over Maxon’s comparison of the two rebel groups and knew this girl must be a Northerner. There was absolutely no aggression in her, only a drive to do her task. And there was no doubt that the attack last night was from the Southern rebels. Did that mean something, that the attacks weren’t only back-to-back, but by different groups? Were the Northerners watching us, waiting for us to be this drained? Thinking about them spying on the palace so intently was a little frightening.

At the same time, the attack was almost funny. Did they simply walk in the front doors? How many hours were they in the palace collecting their treasures? Which reminded me.

“She had books, lots of them,” I said.

Aspen nodded. “That seems to happen a lot. No clue what they’re doing with them. My guess is kindling. I think it’s cold where they stay.” “Hmm,” I replied, not really answering. If I needed kindling, I could think of much easier places to get it than the palace. And the way the girl was so desperate to gather up the books made me sure it was something more than that.

It took nearly an hour of slow, steady trekking to get back to the palace. Even though he was injured, Aspen never let his hold on me slip. In fact, he looked to be enjoying the walk despite the extra labor. I liked it, too.

“The next few days might be busy for me, but I’ll try to come see you soon,” Aspen whispered as we crossed the wide, grassy lawn leading up to the palace.

“Okay,” I answered quietly.

He smiled a little as he looked forward, and I joined him, taking in the view. The palace was glittering in the evening sun, with windows lit up on every story. I’d never seen it like this. It was beautiful.

For some reason I thought Maxon would be there, waiting by the back doors for me. He wasn’t. No one was. Aspen was instructed to take me to the hospital wing so Dr. Ashlar could tend to my legs while another guard went off to tell the royal family I’d been found alive.

My homecoming was a nonevent. I was alone in a hospital bed with bandaged legs, and that was how I stayed until I fell asleep.

I heard someone sneeze.

I opened my eyes, confused for a second before remembering where I was. I blinked, looking around the room.

“I didn’t mean to wake you,” Maxon said in hushed tones. “You should go back to sleep.” He was propped up in a chair by my bed, so close he could rest his head by my elbow if he wanted to.

“What time is it?” I rubbed my eyes.

“Almost two.”

“In the morning?”

Maxon nodded. He watched me carefully, and I was suddenly very worried about how I looked. I had washed my face and pulled my hair up when I came back, but I was pretty sure I had a pillow imprinted on my cheek.

“Don’t you ever sleep?” I asked.

“I do. I’m just on edge a lot.”

“Occupational hazard?” I sat up a bit more.

He gave me a thin smile. “Something like that.” There was a long pause as we sat there, unsure of what to say next.

“I thought of something today, when I was in the woods,” I said casually.

He smiled a bit more at how easily I brushed off the incident. “Oh, really?” “It was about you.”

He inched closer, his brown eyes focused on mine. “Do tell.” “Well,” I started, “I was thinking about how you were last night when Elise and Kriss weren’t in the hall, how worried you were. And then today I saw you try to run after me when the rebels came.” “I tried. I’m so sorry.” He shook his head, ashamed that he hadn’t done more.

“I’m not upset,” I explained. “That’s the thing. When I was out there alone, I thought about how worried you probably were, how worried you are about the others. And I can’t pretend to know how you feel about all of us, but I know that you and I aren’t exactly a highlight right now.” He chuckled. “We’ve seen better days.”

“But you still ran after me. You handed Kriss off to a guard because she couldn’t run. You’re trying to keep us all safe. So why would you ever hurt one of us?” He sat silently, not sure where I was going.

“I understand now. If you’re that concerned with our safety, you couldn’t have wanted to do that to Marlee. I’m sure you would have stopped it if you could.” He sighed. “In a heartbeat.”

“I know.”

Tentatively, Maxon reached across the bed for my hand. I let him take it. “Do you remember how I said I had something I wanted to show you?” “Yes.”

“Don’t forget, okay? It’s coming. This position requires a lot of things, and they aren’t always pleasant. But sometimes . . . sometimes you can do great things.” I didn’t understand what he meant, but I nodded.

“I suppose it will have to wait until you’re done with this project though. You’re a bit behind.” “Ugh!” I pulled my hand from Maxon’s to cover my eyes. I’d completely forgotten about the reception. I looked back at him. “Are they still going to make us do that? There’ve been two rebel attacks, and I spent the majority of my day lost in the woods. We’re going to mess it up.” Maxon’s face was sympathetic. “You’ll have to push through.” I let my head flop back on the pillow. “It’s going to be a disaster.” He chuckled. “Don’t worry. Even if you don’t do as well as the others, I don’t have it in me to kick you out.” Something in that sounded funny. I sat back up. “Are you saying that if the others do worse, one of them could be kicked out?” Maxon hesitated a moment, clearly unsure how to respond.

“Maxon?”

He sighed. “I have about two weeks before they expect another cut. This is supposed to be a big part of it. You and Kriss have the harder setup. A new relationship, fewer people to do the work; and while the culture is very celebratory, the Italians are easy to offend. Add to that the fact that you’ve hardly been able to do any work at all . . .” I wondered if the blood was visibly draining from my face.

“I’m not supposed to help, but if you need something, please say so. I can’t send either of you home.” When we’d had our first fight, a stupid spat over Celeste, I thought a piece of me shattered for Maxon. And then when Marlee left so abruptly, I thought it did again. I was sure that every time something blocked my way, bits of my heart were crumbling to nothing. But I was wrong.

There, lying in the hospital wing, my heart broke for the first time over Maxon Schreave. And the ache was unthinkable. Up until then I could convince myself that I’d imagined everything I’d seen between him and Kriss, but now I knew for sure.

He liked her. Maybe as much as he liked me.

I nodded at his offer for help, unable to say anything else.

I told myself to tug my heart back, that he couldn’t have it. Maxon and I started all this as friends, and maybe that’s all we were meant to be: close friends. But I was crushed.

“I should go,” he said. “You need sleep. You had a very long day.” I rolled my eyes. That wasn’t the half of it.

Maxon stood and straightened his suit. “I wanted to say so much more to you. I really thought I’d lost you today.” I shrugged. “I’m fine. Really.”

“I can see that now, but there were several hours today when I was forced to brace myself for the worst.” He paused, measuring his words. “Usually, of all the girls, you’re the easiest to talk to about what we are. But I have a feeling that perhaps that’s not the wisest thing to do right now.” Ducking my head, I gave a slight nod. I couldn’t try to talk about my feelings for a person who obviously had a crush on someone else.

“Look at me, America,” he asked gently.

I did.

“I’m fine with that. I can wait. I just want you to know . . . I’m not able to find words big enough to express how relieved I am that you’re here, in one piece. I’ve never been so grateful for anything.” I was stunned into silence, the way I always was when he touched the shy places of my heart. A corner of myself worried at how easily I trusted his words.

“Goodnight, America.”