فصل سی و یکم

CHAPTER 31

STELLA

“What happened to winging it, Stella? Doing it ‘Abby Style,’ ” Mya says, nudging me playfully.

I glance up from my itinerary, laughing as I carefully fold it and put it into my back pocket. “Rome wasn’t built in a day.” I smirk at her and Camila, proud of my Vatican City joke. “Get it? Rome?” Camila laughs, rolling her eyes. “New lungs, but not a new sense of humor.” I take a deep breath at her words, my lungs effortlessly expanding and contracting. It’s still so wonderful, I can hardly believe it. These past eight months have been bittersweet, to say the least. My new lungs are amazing, the physical pain of the surgery gradually giving way to a whole new life. My parents are back together, and we’re all finally starting to mend, too. Like my new lungs, it hasn’t fixed everything that’s broken. The losses of Abby and Poe are pains I don’t think I’ll ever fully get over. Just like I know that no matter what, some part of me will never get over Will. And that’s okay.

The pain reminds me that they were here, that I’m alive.

Thanks to Will I have so much more life to live. So much more time. Aside from his love, it was the greatest gift I could ever receive. And I can’t believe now that I almost didn’t take it.

I gaze around the airport at the high ceilings and the wide windows, excitement coursing through my veins as we walk to gate 17 for our flight to Rome. A trip I can finally take. To Vatican City and the Sistine Chapel and the first of so many things I want to do and see. It isn’t with Abby, and I certainly won’t be crossing off that one item on Will’s bucket list, but just going makes me feel closer to them.

I realize as we walk that I’m setting the pace, Camila and Mya following right behind. I would have keeled over from this much walking a few months ago, but now it feels like I could just keep going.

“Everyone in for a picture!” Mya says when we find our gate, holding up her phone as we squeeze together, smiling big for the camera.

After the flash we pull apart and I glance down at my phone to see a picture from my mom of my dad eating breakfast, his eggs and bacon in the shape of a sad face with the caption MISS YOU ALREADY, STELL! Send pictures!

I laugh, nudging Mya. “Hey, make sure you send it to my parents; they’ve already been asking nonstop for pictures of . . .” My voice trails off as I see that her mouth is open in shock, and she’s staring at Camila.

“What? Did I do that thing with my face again?” Camila asks, sighing loudly. “I don’t know why I keep smiling like that—” Mya holds up her hand to cut her off, her eyes flicking urgently to a big group of people waiting to board their plane, finally focusing on something behind me. Camila inhales sharply.

I turn around, following her gaze, the hairs on the back of my neck standing on end as my eyes travel down the long line of people.

My heart begins to beat faster when my eyes land on Jason.

And then I know. I know he’s there even before I see him.

Will.

I stand, frozen in place as he looks up and our eyes lock, the familiar blue that I’ve dreamed about for so long almost knocking me off my feet. He’s still sick, portable oxygen slung over his shoulder, his face gaunt and tired. It’s almost a physical pain to see him like this, to feel my lungs filling anew when his can’t.

But then his mouth turns up into that lopsided smile and the world melts away. It’s Will. It’s really him. He’s sick, but alive. We both are.

I take a deep, unhindered breath and walk over to him, stopping exactly six feet away from him. His eyes are warm as he takes me in. No portable oxygen, no difficulty breathing, no nose cannula.

I’m practically a different Stella.

Except for one thing.

I smile at him, and take just that one more stolen step, until we’re five feet apart.