فصل 43

CHAPTER 43

It took a long time for Thomas to find sleep again.

He had no doubt it had been Teresa. None at all. Just like before when they’d spoken to each other, he’d felt her presence, sensed her emotions. She’d been with him, even if it had been for such a short time. And when she left, it was like opening up that vast void within all over again. As if during the days since her disappearance a thick liquid had slowly seeped in and filled that chamber, only to have it all sucked out again when she came and went.

What had she meant, anyway? Something awful was going to happen to him, but he needed to trust her? He couldn’t wrap his mind around that enough for it to make any sense. And as awful as her warning sounded, his thoughts kept drifting to the last part, about them being together again. Was that some string of false hope? Or did it mean she thought he’d make it through the bad thing and end up okay? Reunited with her? Possibilities raced through his mind, but they all seemed to hit a depressing dead end.

The day only got hotter and hotter as he tossed and turned, haunted by his thoughts. He’d almost grown used to Teresa’s being gone, which made him sick to his stomach. To make it worse, he felt like he’d betrayed her by letting Brenda become his friend, by growing so close to her.

Ironically, his first instinct was to reach out and wake Brenda, talk to her about it. Was that wrong? He felt so frustrated and stupid he wanted to scream.

All great for someone trying to fall back asleep in the miserable heat.

The sun had trudged halfway to the horizon before he finally did.

He felt a little better in the late evening when Newt shook him awake. Teresa’s brief visit to his mind seemed like a dream now. He could almost believe it had never happened.

“Sleep well, Tommy?” Newt asked. “How’s that shoulder?”

Thomas sat up, rubbed his eyes. Though he couldn’t have slept for more than three or four hours, his sleep had been deep and undisturbed. He rubbed his shoulder to test it and was surprised all over again. “Feels really good, actually—aches a little, but not much. Hard to believe I was hurtin’ so bad before.” Newt looked around at the Gladers preparing to leave, then back at Thomas. “Feels like we haven’t talked much since leaving the bloody dorm. Not much time to sit around and sip tea, I guess.” “Yeah.” For some reason this made Thomas think of Chuck, and all the pain of his death came rushing back. Which just made him hate the people behind all this all over again. The line from Teresa came back to him. “I don’t see how WICKED can be good.” “Huh?”

“Remember what Teresa had written on her arm when she first woke up? Or did you even know about that? It said WICKED is good. I’m just finding that hard to believe.” The sarcasm in his voice wasn’t subtle.

Newt had a strange smile on his face. “Well, they just saved your buggin’ life.”

“Yeah, they’re real saints.” Thomas couldn’t deny he was confused. They had saved his life. He also knew he’d worked for them. But what it all meant, he had no idea.

Brenda, who had been stirring in her sleep, now finally sat up, letting out a big yawn. “Morning. Or evening. Whatever.” “Another day alive,” Thomas answered, then realized Newt might have no idea who Brenda was. He really had no idea what had happened in the group since he’d been shot. “I’m assuming you guys had time to get to know each other? If not, Brenda, this is Newt. Newt, Brenda.” “Yeah, we know already.” Newt reached out and shook her hand mockingly. “But thanks again for making sure this bloody sissy didn’t get his butt killed while you two were out partying.” The barest hint of a smile flashed across her face. “Partying. Yeah. I especially loved the part where we had people trying to cut our noses off.” A look flashed across her face, part embarrassment, part despair. “Guess it won’t be long before I’m one of those psychos.” Thomas didn’t know how to respond to that. “You’re probably not that much farther along than us. Remember that—” Brenda wouldn’t let him finish. “Yeah, I know. You guys are gonna take me to the magical cure. I know.” She got up then, the conversation obviously over.

Thomas looked at Newt, who shrugged. Then, as he got to his knees, he leaned in and whispered, “She your new girlfriend? I’m telling Teresa.” He snickered to himself and was gone.

Thomas sat there for a minute, overwhelmed by it all. Teresa, Brenda, his friends. The warning he’d received. The Flare. The fact that they only had a few days to cross those mountains. WICKED. Whatever waited for them at the safe haven and in the future.

Too much. It was all too much.

He had to stop thinking. He was hungry, and that he could solve. So he got up and went searching for something to eat. And Frypan didn’t disappoint.

They set off just as the sun dipped below the horizon, making the dusty orange land look almost purple. Thomas was cramped and tired, itching to walk off some steam and loosen his muscles.

The mountains slowly became jagged peaks of shadow, growing taller and taller as they walked. There were no real foothills to speak of; the flat valley just stretched forward until the ground erupted toward the sky in sheer cliffs and steep slopes. All brown and ugly, lifeless. Thomas hoped an obvious path would present itself once they’d made it that far.

No one spoke much as they marched along. Brenda stayed close but quiet. She didn’t even talk to Jorge. Thomas hated how it was now. How suddenly everything was awkward between him and Brenda. He liked her, probably more than he liked anyone else now besides Newt and Minho. And Teresa, of course.

Newt approached him after darkness had fallen, the stars and moon their only guides. Their light was enough—you didn’t need much when the ground was flat and all you had to do was walk toward the looming wall of rock in front of you. The crunch crunch crunch of their footsteps on the earth filled the air.

“Been thinkin’,” Newt said.

“About what?” Thomas didn’t really care; he was just glad to have someone to talk to and get his mind off things.

“WICKED. Ya know, they broke their own bloody rules with you.”

“How’s that?”

“They said there were no rules. Said we had so much time to get to the bloody safe haven and that was that. No rules. People dying left and right, then they come down in a buggin’ monster flying thing and save your butt. Doesn’t make sense.” He paused. “Not that I’m complaining—I’m glad you’re alive and all.” “Gee, thanks.” Thomas knew it was a good point, but he was tired of thinking about it.

“And then there were all those signs in the city. Weird.”

Thomas looked over at Newt, barely able to see his friend’s face. “What, you jealous or something?” he asked, trying to make a joke out of it. Trying to ignore the fact that the signs had to be a big deal.

Newt laughed. “No, you shank. Just dying to know what’s really going on around here. What this is really all about.” “Yeah.” Thomas nodded. He couldn’t agree more. “The lady said only a few of us were good enough to be Candidates. And she did say I was the best Candidate, and they didn’t want me dying from something they hadn’t planned. But I don’t know what it all means. Has something to do with all that klunk about killzone patterns.” They walked on for a minute or so before Newt spoke again. “Not worth bustin’ our brains about, I guess. What’s gonna happen’ll happen.” Thomas almost told him then about what Teresa had said in his mind, but for some reason it just didn’t feel right.

He stayed silent, and eventually Newt drifted away until once again Thomas walked alone in the dark.

A couple of hours passed before he had another conversation, this time with Minho. A lot of words flew back and forth between them, but in the end they hadn’t really said much. Just passing time, rehashing the same questions they’d all gone over in their minds a million times.

Thomas’s legs were a little tired, but not too bad. The mountains got ever closer. The air cooled considerably, and it felt wonderful. Brenda remained silent and distant.

And on they went.

When the first traces of dawn turned the sky a deep, dark blue, the stars beginning to wink away for the coming day, Thomas finally got the nerve to approach Brenda and talk about something. Anything. The cliffs loomed now, dead trees and chunks of scattered rock coming into focus. They’d reach the foot of the mountains by the time the sun popped over the horizon, Thomas was sure of it.

“Hey,” he said to her. “How’re your feet holding up?”

“Fine.” It came out curt, but then she quickly spoke again, maybe trying to make up for it. “How about you? Your shoulder seem okay?” “I can’t believe how fine it is. Doesn’t hurt much at all.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah.” He racked his brain, trying to think of something to say. “So, um, I’m sorry about all the weird stuff that happened. And … for anything I said. My head’s all kinds of crazy and messed up.” She looked over at him, and he could see a bit of softness in her eyes. “Please, Thomas. The last thing you need to do is apologize.” She returned her gaze up ahead. “We’re just different. Plus, you have that girlfriend of yours. I shouldn’t have tried to kiss you and all that crap.” “She’s not really my girlfriend.” He regretted saying it as soon as it came out—didn’t even know where it had come from.

Brenda huffed. “Don’t be dumb. And don’t insult me. If you’re gonna resist this”—she paused and gestured to herself with a sweep of her hands from head to toe with a mocking smile—“then it better be for a good reason.” Thomas laughed—all the tension and awkwardness had just vanished completely. “Point taken. You’re probably a crappy kisser anyway.” She punched him in the arm—luckily his good one. “You couldn’t possibly be more wrong. Trust me on that one.” Thomas was just about to say something stupid when he stopped dead in his tracks. Somebody almost ran into him from behind, tripped around to his side, but he couldn’t tell who—his eyes were glued in front of him, his heart completely frozen.

The sky had lightened considerably, and the leading edge of the mountains’ slope lay just a few hundred feet away. Halfway between here and there, a girl had seemingly appeared out of nowhere, rising from the ground. And she was walking toward them at a brisk pace.

In her hands she held a long shaft of wood with a large, nasty-looking blade lashed to one end.

It was Teresa.