فصل 5

What Exceptions?

The weekend event was deeper than I ever expected. Dr. Hew Len explained that everything you seek and everything you experience—everything—is inside you. If you want to change anything, you do it inside, not outside.The whole idea is total responsibility.There’s no one to blame. It’s all you.

“But what about when somebody gets raped?” a person asked.“Or what if there’s a car accident? We’re not responsible for all that, are we?”

“Have you ever noticed that whenever you have a problem, you are there?” he asked.“It’s all about 100 percent responsibility for everything. No exceptions. There’s no loophole that lets you off the hook for something you don’t like.You’re responsible for all of it—all.” Even when he worked at the mental hospital and he saw murderers and rapists, he took responsibility. He understood that they were acting from a memory or a program. To help them, he had to remove the memory.The only way to do that is by cleaning.This is what he meant when he said he never saw clients professionally in a therapeutic setting. He looked at their charts. As he did, he silently said to the Divine, “I love you,” “I’m sorry,” “Please forgive me,” and “Thank you.” He was doing what he knew to do to help the patients return to a state of zero limits.As Dr. Hew Len did this within himself, the patients healed.

Dr. Hew Len explained, “Simply put, ho’oponopono means, ‘to make right’ or ‘to rectify an error.’ Ho’o means ‘cause’ in Hawaiian and ponopono means ‘perfection.’ According to the ancient Hawaiians, error arises from thoughts that are tainted by painful memories from the past. Ho’oponopono offers a way to release the energy of these painful thoughts, or errors, which cause imbalance and disease.” In short, ho’oponopono is simply a problem-solving process. But it’s done entirely within yourself.

This new and improved process was created by Morrnah, the beloved kahuna who taught her method to Dr. Hew Len in November 1982. Dr. Hew Len had heard of a “miracle worker” lecturing at hospitals, colleges, and even the United Nations. He met her, saw her heal his daughter of shingles, and left everything to study with her and learn her simplified healing method. Since Dr. Hew Len was also experiencing difficulties in his marriage at the time, he left his family, as well. That’s not too unusual. There’s a long history of people leaving their families to study with a spiritual teacher. Dr. Hew Len wanted to learn Morrnah’s method.

But he didn’t instantly accept her odd ways. He signed up for a workshop led by her and walked out after three hours.“She was talking to spirits and sounded nuts,” he said. “So I left.”

He went back a week later, paid the tuition fee again, and tried to sit through another workshop with her. He still couldn’t do it. Everything she taught seemed so crazy to his university-trained mind that he again walked out of her seminar.

“I went back a third time and this time I stayed for the entire weekend,” he told me. “I still thought she was crazy, but something about her spoke to my heart. I stayed with her until her transition in 1992.”

Morrnah’s self-directed inner method worked miracles, according to Dr. Hew Len and others. Her prayer somehow erased memories and programs just by saying it. I knew I wanted to learn that liturgy and would not rest until I knew it.

Morrnah hinted at her method in an article she wrote for the book I Am a Winner: “I have used the old system since age two, I have revamped the process, yet it retains the ‘essence’ of the ‘ancient wisdom.’ ”

Mabel Katz, in her little book, The Easiest Way, says: “Ho’oponopono is a process of forgiveness, repentance, and transformation. Every time we use any of its tools, we are taking 100 percent responsibility and asking for forgiveness (for ourselves).We learn that everything that appears in our lives is only a projection of our ‘programs.’ ” I wondered how Morrnah’s updated Self I-Dentity Ho’oponopono process differed from traditional ho’oponopono. Dr. Hew Len explained it this way:

Self I-Dentity through Ho’oponopono Traditional Ho’oponopono

1. Problem solving is intrapersonal. 1. Problem solving is interpersonal.

2. Only you and the I are involved. 2. A senior member mediates the problem solving session with all participants.

3. Only you are physically present. 3. Everyone involved in the problem must be physically present.

4. Repentance to the I. 4. Each participant is required to repent to each other, with the senior member mediating so that participants don’t get contentious.

5. Forgiveness from the I. 5. Each participant is required to ask forgiveness of each of the other participants.

In traditional ho’oponopono, the senior member, trained in the dynamics of problem solving, is responsible to see that everyone gets a chance to say what each sees as the problem. This is always an area of contention in the traditional ho’oponopono because each participant sees the problem differently. I have to admit I like the new and improved process, as it all happens within the person.You don’t need anyone else at all. This makes more sense to me. Since I’m a student of Jungian-based teachers such as best-selling author Debbie Ford (The Dark Side of the Light Chasers), I already understood that the place for change is within you, not the environment or any other person.

“Along with the updated Ho’oponopono process,” Dr. Hew Len continued, “Morrnah was guided to include the three parts of the self, which are the key to Self I-Dentity.These three parts—which exist in every molecule of reality—are called the Unihipili (child/subconscious), the Uhane (mother/conscious), and the Aumakua (father/superconscious). When this ‘inner family’ is in alignment, a person is in rhythm with the Divinity. With this balance, life begins to flow. Thus, Ho’oponopono helps restore balance in the individual first, and then in all of creation.” He went on to explain more about this amazing process:

“Ho’oponopono is really very simple. For the ancient Hawaiians, all problems begin as thought. But having a thought is not the problem. So what’s the problem? The problem is that all our thoughts are imbued with painful memories—memories of persons, places, or things.

“The intellect working alone can’t solve these problems, because the intellect only manages. Managing things is no way to solve problems. You want to let them go! When you do Ho’oponopono, what happens is that the Divinity takes the painful thought and neutralizes or purifies it. You don’t purify the person, place, or thing. You neutralize the energy you associate with that person, place, or thing. So the first stage of Ho’oponopono is the purification of that energy.

“Now something wonderful happens. Not only does that energy get neutralized; it also gets released, so there’s a brand-new slate. Buddhists call it the Void. The final step is that you allow the Divinity to come in and fill the void with light.

“To do ho’oponopono, you don’t have to know what the problem or error is. All you have to do is notice any problem you are experiencing physically, mentally, emotionally, whatever. Once you notice, your responsibility is to immediately begin to clean, to say,’I’m sorry. Please forgive me.’ ” As I researched Morrnah, even finding DVDs of interviews with her, I finally found the prayer she would say to heal people, whether she saw them or not.The liturgy she said went like this:

Divine creator, father, mother, son as one . . . If I, my family, relatives, and ancestors have offended you, your family, relatives, and ancestors in thoughts, words, deeds, and actions from the beginning of our creation to the present, we ask your forgiveness. . . . Let this cleanse, purify, release, cut all the negative memories, blocks, energies, and vibrations and transmute these unwanted energies to pure light. . . . And it is done.

I wasn’t sure how this unlocked the healing within someone, but I could see that it was based on forgiveness. Apparently Morrnah, and now Dr. Hew Len, felt that by asking for forgiveness we cleared the path for healing to be manifest. What was blocking our well-being was nothing more than lack of love. Forgiveness opened the door to allow it back in.

I found all of this fascinating. I wasn’t sure how doing ho’oponopono could help heal me, you, or the mentally ill, however. But I kept listening. Dr. Hew Len went on to explain that we have to take 100 percent responsibility for our lives—no exceptions, no excuses, no loopholes.

“Can you imagine if we all knew we are 100 percent responsible?” he asked. “I made a deal with myself 10 years ago that I would treat myself to a hot fudge sundae—so huge it would make me sick—if I could get through the day without having some judgment of someone. I’ve never been able to do it! I notice I catch myself more often, but I never get through a day.” Well, now I knew he was human. I could relate to his confession. As much work as I’ve done on myself, I still get rattled by people or situations that I wish would be different. I’m far more able to tolerate most things that come my way in life, but I’m also far from being totally loving in every situation.

“But how do I get that across to people—that we are each 100 percent responsible for problems?” he asked. “If you want to solve a problem, work on yourself. If the problem is with another person, for example, just ask yourself, ‘What’s going on in me that’s causing this person to bug me?’ People only show up in your life to bug you! If you know that, you can elevate any situation. How? It’s simple: ‘I’m sorry for whatever’s going on. Please forgive me.’ ” He went on to explain that if you are a massage therapist or chiropractor and someone comes to you with back pain, the question to ask is, “What’s going on inside of me that shows up as this person’s back pain?”

This is a head-spinning new way of looking at life itself. It probably explains, in part, how Dr. Hew Len was able to heal all those mentally ill criminals. He didn’t work on them; he worked on himself.

He went on to explain that at heart we are all pure, with no programs or memories or even inspirations. That’s the zero state. There are zero limits there. But as we live, we catch programs and memories, much like some people catch a cold. We aren’t bad when we catch a cold, but we have to do whatever it takes to clean it. Programs are the same. We catch them. When we see a program in another, we have it, too. The way out is to clean.

Dr. Hew Len said, “There is a way out of problems and disease for any individual willing to be 100 percent responsible for creating his or her life the way it is moment to moment. In the ancient Hawaiian healing process of ho’oponopono, the individual petitions Love to rectify errors within him.You say, ‘I am sorry. Please forgive me for whatever is going on inside of me that manifests as the problem. ‘ Love’s responsibility then is to transmute the errors within him that manifest as the problem.” He added, “Ho’oponopono sees each problem not as an ordeal, but as an opportunity. Problems are just replayed memories of the past showing up to give us one more chance to see with the eyes of love and to act from inspiration.” Again, I’m forbidden to share the intimate details of the workshop. I’m serious. I had to sign a nondisclosure agreement. Mostly it was to protect the privacy of the attendees. But I can tell you this: It is about taking full responsibility for your life.

I know you’ve heard that before. So have I. But you’ve never taken it to the all-encompassing extent taught in the workshop. Complete responsibility means accepting it all—even the people who enter your life and their problems, because their problems are your problems. They are in your life, and if you take full responsibility for your life, then you have to take full responsibility for what they are experiencing, too. (Reread that. I dare you.) This is a head-warping, mind-opening, brain-cramping concept. To live it is to transform your life as never before. But to even grasp the idea of 100 percent responsibility is beyond what most of us are ready to do, let alone accept.

But once you accept it, the next question is how to transform yourself so the rest of the world changes, too.

The only sure way is with “I love you.” That’s the code that unlocks the healing. But you use it on you, not on others.Their problem is your problem, remember, so working on them won’t help you. They don’t need healing; you do. You have to heal yourself. You are the source of all the experiences.

That’s the essence of the modernized Ho’oponopono process.

Go ahead and chew on that for a while.

While you are doing so, I will just keep saying, “I love you.”

One of the key points from this weekend workshop is that you are acting from either memory or inspiration. Memory is thinking; inspiration is allowing. Most of us by far are living out of memories. We’re unconscious to them because we’re basically unconscious, period.

In this way of viewing the world, the Divine sends a message down from above, into your mind. But if memories are playing—which they almost always are—you won’t hear the inspiration, let alone act on it. As a result, Divinity doesn’t get a word in.You’re too busy with the noise going on in your head to hear it.

Dr. Hew Len drew a few illustrations to clarify his points. (See the State of Void diagram.) One was a triangle. He said that was you, the individual. At the core, there is nothing but Divinity. That’s the zero state where there are zero limits.

From Divinity, you will receive inspiration. An inspiration is from the Divine, but a memory is a program in the collective unconscious of humankind. A program is like a belief, a programming that we share with others when we notice it in others. Our challenge is to clear all the programs so we are back at the zero state, where inspiration can come.

Dr. Hew Len spent a lot of time explaining that memories are shared. When you spot something in another that you don’t like, you have it in you, as well.Your job is to clean it. As you do, it will leave the other person, as well. Actually, it will eventually leave the world.

“One of the most insistent programs in the world is women’s hatred of men,” Dr. Hew Len announced. “I keep cleaning and it is like pulling weeds in a giant field of weeds. Each weed is a leg of the program. There is a deep-seated hatred of men on the part of women. We must love it to let it go.” 002

I didn’t quite understand all of this. It seemed like yet another model or map of the world. Every psychologist, philosopher, and religion has one. I’m interested in this one because it appears it can help heal the entire planet. After all, if Dr. Hew Len can heal an entire ward of mentally ill criminals, what else is possible?

But Dr. Hew Len pointed out that ho’oponopono is not easy. It takes commitment. “This is not a McDonald’s approach to life,” he said. “This is not a fast-food drive-up window where you instantly get your order. God is not an order taker. It takes constant focus on cleaning, cleaning, cleaning.” He told stories of people who used the cleaning method to do what others might think impossible. One story was about a NASA engineer who came to him because of a problem with one of their rockets.

“Since she came to me, I assumed I was a part of the problem,” Dr. Hew Len explained. “So I cleaned. I said ‘I’m sorry’ to the rocket. Later, when the engineer returned, she explained that the rocket somehow corrected itself in flight.” Did doing ho’oponopono influence the rocket? Dr. Hew Len and the engineer think so. I spoke to the engineer, and she said it was impossible for the rocket to correct itself. Something else had to happen that was in the nature of a miracle. For her, it was doing the cleaning with Dr. Hew Len’s help.

I can’t say I bought this story, but I also have to admit I don’t have another explanation for it.

One man came up to me during a break at the event and said, “There’s a famous Internet marketer who has the same name as you.”

I didn’t know whether he was kidding, so I asked, “Really?”

“Yes, he’s written a lot of books and writes on spiritual marketing and hypnotic writing. He’s a cool guy.”

“That’s me,” I said.

The gentleman seemed very embarrassed. Mark Ryan had heard the entire conversation and thought it was humorous.

It didn’t matter if people knew my celebrity status online or not, as I was getting known in the room itself. Dr. Hew Len called on me so many times during the event that people thought he was singling me out. One person asked, “Are you related to Dr. Hew Len?” I said no and asked why the person thought I might be. “I don’t know; it just seems like he is focusing on you.” I never felt singled out in a negative way. I liked the attention and assumed it was to help me personally, since Dr. Hew Len knew I wrote books and had a following on the Internet. I’m sure a part of him knew that if I got this message of healing, I’d be able to help many people.

I didn’t know at the time that he, being inspired by the Divine, was grooming me to become a guru. But not a guru to the world; a guru to myself.