فصل 15

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Nicky

There was this article in the newspaper once, about a hairless baboon. Her skin wasnt black all over, like youd expect, but kind of mottled, pink and black. Her eyes were black rimmed, like she had this really cool eyeliner on, and she had one long pink nipple and one black one, like a simian, booby David Bowie.

But she was all on her own. It turns out baboons dont like difference. And literally not one baboon was prepared to hang out with her. So she was photographed in picture after picture, just out looking for food, all bare and vulnerable, without a single baboon mate. Because even though all the other baboons, like, knew she was still a baboon, their dislike of difference was stronger than any genetic urge they had to stick with her.

Nicky thought this one thing quite often that there was nothing sadder than a lonely hairless baboon.

Obviously, Mr. Nicholls was about to give him a lecture on the dangers of social networking or say that he had to report it all to his teachers or the police or something. But he opened his car door, pulled out his laptop from the boot, plugged the power lead into a connector near his gearshift, and then plugged in a dongle so that they had broadband.

“Right, he said, as Nicky eased himself into the passenger seat. “Tell me everything you know about this little charmer. Brothers, sisters, dates of birth, pets, address—whatever youve got.

“What?

“We need to work out his password. Come on—you must know something.

They were sitting in the car park. There was no graffiti here, no discarded shopping trolley. This was the kind of place where they walked actual miles to return a shopping trolley. Nicky would have bet money they had one of those Best Kept Village signs, too. A gray-haired woman loading her car beside them caught his eye and smiled. She actually smiled. Or maybe she smiled at Norman, whose big head was hanging over Nickys shoulder.

“Nicky?

“Yeah. Im thinking. He reeled off everything he knew about Fisher. He went through his address, his sisters name, his mums name. He actually knew his birthday, as it was only three weeks previously and his dad had bought him one of those quad bikes, which hed smashed up within a week.

Mr. Nicholls kept tapping away. “Nope. Nope. Come on. There must be something else. What music does he like? What team does he support? Oh, look, hes got a Hotmail address. Great, we can put that in.

Nothing worked. And then Nicky had a sudden thought. “Tulisa. Hes got a thing about Tulisa. The singer.

Mr. Nicholls tapped away at his keyboard, then shook his head.

“Try Tulisas Arse, Nicky said.

Mr. Nicholls typed. “Nope.

“IShaggedTulisa. All one word.

“Nope.

“Tulisa Fisher.

“Mmm. Nope. Nice try, though.

They sat there, thinking.

“You could just try his name, said Nicky.

Mr. Nicholls shook his head. “Nobodys stupid enough to use his name as a password.

Nicky looked at him. Mr. Nicholls typed a few letters, then stared at the screen. “Well, what do you know? He leaned back in his seat. “Youre a natural.

“So what are you doing?

“Were just going to have a little play with Jason Fishers Facebook page. Actually, Im not going to do it. Im . . . uh . . . I cant really risk anything on my IP address right now. But I know someone who can. He dialed a number.

“But wont he know its down to me?

“How? Were basically him right now. Therell be nothing tracing this to you. He probably wont even notice. Hang on. Jez? . . . Hey. Its Ed . . . Yeah. Yeah, Im just under the radar for a bit. I need you to do me a favor. Itll take five minutes.

Nicky listened as he told Jez Jason Fishers password and e-mail address. He said that Fisher had been “creating a few difficulties for a friend. He looked at Nicky sideways as he said this. “Just have a bit of fun with it, yeah? Read through his stuff. Youll get the picture. Id do it myself, but Ive got to keep my hands super clean right now . . . Yeah, Ill explain when I see you. Appreciate it.

Nicky couldnt believe it was so easy. “Wont he hack me back, though?

Mr. Nicholls put down his phone. “Im going to take a punt here. But a boy who cant think further than his own name for a password is not really overflowing with computer skills.

They sat there in the car and waited, refreshing Jason Fishers Facebook page again and again. And like magic, things began to change. Man, Fisher was such a douche. His wall was full of how he was going to “do this girl or that girl from school, or how so-and-so was a slag and how hed battered pretty much everyone outside his crew. His messages were much the same. Nicky glimpsed one message that had his name in it, but Mr. Nicholls read it really fast, scrolled up, and said, “Yeah. You dont need to see that one. The only time Fisher didnt sound like a douche was when he messaged Chrissie Taylor and told her that he really liked her and did she want to come round his house? She didnt sound too keen, but he kept messaging her. He said hed take her out somewhere “really dope and that he could borrow his dads car he couldnt—he was underage. He told her she was the prettiest girl in school and that she was doing his head in and that if his mates knew shed made him like this, theyd think he was “a mentalist.

“Who says romance is dead? Mr. Nicholls murmured.

And so it began. Jez messaged two of Fishers friends and told them that he had decided he was antiviolence, and didnt want to hang out with them anymore. He messaged Chrissie and told her that he still liked her, but he had to get himself sorted out before he went out with her because hed “picked up some stupid infection that the doctor says I need to get medicine for. Ill be nice and clean when we get together, though, eh?

“Oh, man. Nicky was laughing so much that his ribs hurt. “Oh, man.

“Jason told another girl named Stacy that he really liked her and that his mum had picked out some really nice clothes for him if she ever wanted to go out, and he sent the same thing to a girl called Angela in his year whom he had once called a scuzz. And Jez deleted a new message from Danny Kane, who had tickets for some big football match and said Jason could have one, but hed have to let him know by the end of the day. Which was today.

He made Fishers profile picture an image of a braying donkey. And then Mr. Nicholls stared at the screen, thinking, and picked up his mobile. “Actually, I think we should leave his photo there, mate, just for now, he told Jez.

“Why? said Nicky, after hed put down the phone. The donkey thing was kind of excellent.

“Because its better to be subtle. If we just stick to his private messages for now, its entirely likely that he wont even spot them. We send them, then delete them at this end. Well turn off his e-mail notifications. And so his friends, and this girl, will just think hes become even more of an idiot. And he wont have a clue why. Which is kind of the point.

He couldnt believe it. He couldnt believe someone could just mess with Fishers life like that.

Jez rang back to say hed logged out, and they shut down Facebook. “And thats it? Nicky said.

“For now. Its only a bit of fun. But it made you feel better, right? And hes going to clean up your page so that none of the stuff Fisher put up is there anymore.

It was a bit embarrassing then because when Nicky breathed out, he did this kind of shudder. He did feel better. It wasnt like it really solved anything, but for once it was nice not to feel like the butt of the joke.

He messed with the hem of his T-shirt until his breathing went back to normal. It was possible Mr. Nicholls knew, because he looked out of the window like he was really interested even though there was nothing there apart from cars and old people.

“Why would you do all this? The hacking thing and driving us all the way to Scotland. I mean, you dont even know us.

Mr. Nicholls continued to stare out of the window and just for a moment it was like he wasnt really talking to Nicky anymore. “I sort of owe your mum one. And I dont like bullies. They didnt start with your generation, you know.

Mr. Nicholls sat there for a minute, and Nicky was suddenly afraid that he was going to try to make him talk about stuff. That hed do that thing the counselor did at school, where he tried to act like he was your mate and said about fifty times that anything you said would be “just between us until it sounded a little creepy.

“Ill tell you one thing.

Here it comes, Nicky thought. He wiped at his shoulder, where Norman had left a drool.

“Everyone Ive ever met who was worth knowing was a bit different at school. You just need to find your people.

“Find my people.

“Your tribe.

Nicky pulled a face.

“You know, you spend your whole life feeling like you dont quite fit in anywhere. And then you walk into a room one day, whether its at university or an office or some kind of club, and you just go, Ah. There they are. And suddenly you feel at home.

“I dont feel at home anywhere.

“For now.

Nicky considered this. “So where was yours?

“Computing room at the university. I was your basic geek. I met my best mate Ronan there. And then . . . my company. His face fell for a moment.

“But Im stuck there until I finish school. And theres nothing like that where we live, no tribes. Nicky pulled his fringe down over his eyes. “You do things Fishers way or you stay out of his way.

“So find your people online.

“How?

“I dont know. Look up online groups for things youre . . . interested in? Lifestyle choices?

Nicky registered his expression. “Oh. You think Im gay, too, right?

“No, Im just saying that the Internets a big place. Theres always someone out there who shares your interests, whose life is like yours.

“Nobodys life is like mine.

Mr. Nicholls shut his laptop and slid it into a case. He unplugged everything and glanced over toward the café.

“We should head back. Your mum will be wondering what were up to. He opened his door and then turned back. “You know, you could always write a blog.

“A blog?

“Doesnt have to be under your real name. But its a good way of talking about whats going on in your life. You put a few keywords in, and people will find you. People like you, I mean.

“People who wear mascara. And who dont like football or musical theater.

“And who have enormous stinking dogs and sisters who are maths prodigies. I bet you theres at least one person like that somewhere. He thought for a minute. “Maybe. Perhaps in Hoxton. Or Tupelo.

Nicky pulled at his fringe some more, trying to cover the bruise, which had gone this really grim yellow. “Thanks, but blogs are . . . not really my thing. Blogs are like for middle-aged women writing about their divorces and cats and stuff. Or nail varnish obsessives.

“Just putting it out there.

“Do you write one?

“Nope. He climbed out of the car. “But then I dont particularly want to talk to anyone. Nicky climbed out after him. Mr. Nicholls pointed his key chain and the car locked down with an expensive thunk. “In the meantime, he said, lowering his voice, “we didnt have this conversation, okay? It wouldnt go down too well if anyone knew I was teaching innocent kids how to hack into private information.

“Jess wouldnt mind.

“Im not just talking about Jess.

Nicky held his gaze. “First rule of Geek Club. There is no Geek Club.